Salt Licks

Memoirs of a Downward Facing Dog

Though the arched, wooden bows might be wobbly, the canvas tattered and torn, the suspension about as bouncy as a slab of cement, and certainly towing with oxen parched as the desert, it is safe to say, that I’m taking a trip into wild, unchartered territory riding high and rickety upon a Prairie Schooner. Aka—I’m on the wagon.

The resolve of another inspired and bolstered the resolve in myself and not even two weeks in and I wonder, is it wrong to stand motionless in the wine section of the grocery store and longingly fantasize about licking the side of a curved, glass bottle?

And when I say, “taking a trip into wild, unchartered territory” we’re not necessarily talking gun-slinging cowboys and herds of wild horses, rattlesnakes and whiskey, Rocky Mountains and dysentery. Oh no, my version of that wild, wild West means living on the razor sharp edge of seltzer water and repetitive nights of Netflix on the couch.

And though it has been an interesting experiment; noticing those moments when we habitually socially lubricate in uncomfortable situations, soothe and appease stress-riddled nerves, bolster and upsell our confidence-joy capacity or conversely, numb all of those dark places we’d rather not look at, it hasn’t been excruciatingly hard.

Mostly, I just want to sleep and eat. I add exercise in because I probably need some endorphins.

My partner in anti-booze crime has noted how boring life has become, but I disagree. It’s winter, and granted, Portland winter does not necessarily justify hibernation like my Montreal counterparts, yet even still, I’m happy to cozy up in my cave and ride out the quiet on a wave of bad television.

Isn’t it time for a catnap??

The thing is, I feel grateful for the opportunity to rest.  I have a sneaking suspicion that shit is about to get real. Life is about to happen. And I think I’m going to need a little R & R to store up for what comes next. Imaginary squirrels stashing nuts for the proverbial winter.

It’s time to get strong.

What is required of us is big. There is a purpose. You know that you will have impact.

So, sleep.




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